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I learned a new word today, can you tell?  I like it.  Cogitation:  thought or reflection.

  • John preached a message yesterday about how we often say, when caught in an habitual sin or mistake, “I can’t help myself!”  This can be an excuse that keeps us from really finding help out of those habits.  The behavior on the outside of us is really only a symptom of a problem on the inside of us.  If our heart isn’t pure or motivated by God’s Spirit then out come the boo-boos and trip-ups.  When I consider that truth about our hearts, then the phrase “I can’t help myself” is spot on truth.  I can’t fix my heart.  I can’t remove the smudge of sin or human weakness, but Jesus can.  Good ponder fodder, as I like to say.
  • Our family will possibly be making a move out west soon to serve God in the great state of California.  This isn’t a for sure thing yet, but the possibility is taking shape and will show itself in final form soon.  Part of me is excited beyond belief because I love the west, the sunshine and the idea of living closer to my sister and my parents (when they retire to Arizona this winter).  Part of me is in denial until we actually step out of limbo land that we’ve been living in for so long.  Part of me is not too keen on the challenges and changes that come when you move, especially all the way across the country, BUT (and it’s a big but) this part of me is pretty small right now.
  • I likened myself to Moses today.  Don’t laugh.  I don’t consider myself to be anywhere near the faith hero he was or enjoy quite the amazing intimacy He had with God.  However, I do feel a little like what He must have felt like when God told Him he would have to just sit on the mountain and watch his people actually cross over into the promised land.  He didn’t get to go with them.  It was his fault.  He had disobeyed God back during the wilderness wanderings and so this was his consequence.  I don’t feel like the last six to eight months of our life is my fault but I do feel jealous and a little sad watching my old church family march into a bright and promising future without me.  Just being honest.  My girls are still attending there so they come home with happy stories and excited looks on their faces.  I’m thrilled for what God is doing and what He’s going to do.  I just wish I could be a part of it.  Okay, enough whining about that.
  • I’m about to head out to Zumba class, the new love of my life.  I get to dance and jive around to really loud, fun music and burn calories while doing it.  What could be better or more fun than that??  Speaking of which, I better get going!