There have been chilly winds and slushy roads, but I had the most wonderfully warm weekend.
Friday evening a good friend and her little girl accompanied Krissy and I as we went to see “A Christmas Carol” performed at our church. I love that story and the reminder of our God who redeems and gives second chances (and third, fourth, and so on). On the way home we talked and talked and it filled up my heart. I’ve missed her.
Saturday evening I met my co-workers at a lovely Italian restaurant on Geist reservoir for our annual Christmas staff dinner. Wow – delicious. We went to my boss’ home afterward for some Wii action and goodies. I then hopped in my car and sped to Anderson to watch my middle girl perform along with lots of other college kids in a musical variety show put on by one of the social clubs about once a quarter. My oldest and her boyfriend had saved me a seat near the front. We heard some great music by so many talented (and funny) young people! When Kaitlin sang my heart swelled. I know I’m her mother, but she was one of the best of the night.
Sunday morning early my hubby and I got ready and drove to Anderson to pick up our daughters, then headed down the snowy highway to Columbus, Ohio for my parents’ retirement celebration. The church where they have pastored the last six years threw a wonderful lunch party for them. It was loving, yet light-hearted, and blessed all of us. I’m so proud of my mom and dad and the years they’ve spent giving of themselves, loving people, enduring difficulties, and staying true to Jesus and each other.
We had to leave soon afterward to drive back to Indiana. The roads there and back were slick and a little nerve-racking at times but we arrived home safely.
Once we got home, I had time to sit on the couch with my youngest, as we snuggled in robes and slippers, watching a movie and eating little pizzas. Sometimes, every so often now, she will snuggle with me again or let me sit close and love on her. That makes this mom’s heart really happy.
This morning she had a snow day and I had a 2-hour delay so got to sleep in for another couple of hours! I’m on a roll, people. As I drove to work I thanked God for all that he’s done for me and my family this year. It’s been one of the hardest years in many ways, but also a good one. I thanked Him for the healing he’s done in my heart. If you asked me at the start of the year about being a pastor’s wife I would have run the opposite direction as fast as possible or hidden. The thought of interviewing with a new church, meeting new people, and beginning the process all over again made me want to hurl. (just being honest) Circumstances had caused me to question our ability to pastor anyway. No matter how many times you are told that your gifts are just different or not the ones needed for a certain ministry, it still feels like you’re not good enough. Thankfully John has never wavered in the calling God has placed on his life to teach/equip people and to pastor. It would have been a lot tougher if we were both doubting that call.
Since that time, through lots of different lessons, God has challenged and comforted me. He has helped me learn to see fear instead as opportunity to trust Him. He’s shown me that He has a plan to use the gifts He’s given my husband. He’s forgiven me for selfish attitudes. He’s given me a year off from major responsibility at church so I could rest, worship and just be. I can now say honestly that I’m looking forward to a new start somewhere, doing something new for Him. I’m ready to stand next to my husband and get my hands dirty if it will bring more people to Jesus and help others grow stronger in their relationship with God.
I’m enjoying a heart that is singing songs of thankfulness today. In spite of the wind chill or snow, I feel nice and warm.