My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”
And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.” Psalm 27:8
We left early yesterday morning for the airport and had smooth flights all the way to Tucson, Arizona, where my parents were waiting with big grins and open arms at baggage claim. It was sunny and hot as we walked to the car, just like I love it, and I was pinching myself. Mom and I started yakking from the moment we hugged and hadn’t stopped yet. Big saguaro cactus and spiny yuccas lined the parking lot. Rust-colored mountains sprinkled with bushes and trees surrounded us as we drove south on the two-lane highway to where my parents live.
Before we left home, God told me this vacation is a big opportunity for me to learn better how to get alone and just be with Him. For some reason, I have a problem with that. My brain is always busy and guilt is always waiting at the door to pounce when I try to just sit and make me feel I should be doing something.
I’m reading a book my sister recommended, Sensible Shoes, and it is hitting me right where it counts. It profiles four different women as they attend a spiritual growth gathering. I can relate to a little of each one, but probably the most to Hannah, the minister who is always busy and had to be forced to take a sabbatical. Toward the beginning of the story Hannah has a dream that she is a little girl running outside to gather flowers and then bring them in to Jesus. She keeps doing this – running outside, gathering flowers, running in and handing them to Jesus, until one time He reaches out and holds her/stops her. He tells her to just sit and be with Him; that is what he really wants most. With a few tears welling up in my eyes, I thought, “That could totally have been me in that dream.”
I hear him knocking often on my heart’s door and I constantly say, “Just a minute, Lord,” or “I’ll be with you this afternoon, Jesus” or some other excuse to do things on my mental to-do list. Deep down though, my heart is aching to just be in His presence and have stillness overwhelm me. I need Him to grab a hold of me and stop me, draw me close and let me know that it is perfectly okay to do nothing at times and rest. That it’s okay to enjoy being with Him and not keep thinking of when it has to end, when I have to do something or go somewhere.
This week I want to purposefully put myself in places where I can do just that. It should be easy out here. It’s very quiet, wide open and beautiful, breezy, and there are plenty of chairs on the porch that wraps around the whole house where I will be able to find alone time. If you read this, would you say a prayer that God will help me learn to do that this week?
“Step out of the traffic! Take a long,
loving look at me, your High God,
…above everything.” Psalm 46:8-10